I open this blog to vent and simultaneously I pull up Pandora to help ease this stress and 'sympathy' by goo goo dolls is the first song so please excuse me if I get soft halfway thru this blog. LOL.
So let's address this teacher. One of his first sentences on the first day was, "I try to be a cool teacher, you can call me 'Doc' or 'Dr. B.' whatever works (as long as it refers to doctor <<< this was implied)." Okay Doc, ya this takes me away to Stephen King's "The Shining." Were you that little boy doc? Have you seen that movie doc? Guess not. So, Doc, 'mister I just got out of college in which I was in a fraternity and I was probably the smartest douche bag of 'em all' well guess what, you will be teaching a billion different students during your career, so I don't think Greek life is necessarily someting I'd open with. Second of all, you have fun grading EVERYTHING to a teeee. You have fun grading that homework that I bullshitted because I guaranteed you just spent more time on that than I did. Oh, and I greatly enjoy your sentence corrections on my homework as if I'm some illiterate. So please excuse my commas not being in the correct spots if you're reading this. I was pretty tipsy when I wrote the essay part of that homework, so just know that i don't speak in the wrong verb tenses. From what i've heard, you have had some pretty bad evaluations in the past so why don't you step up your game? Maybe you didnt take in all the constructive criticism? Sorry your the opener, but when you write shitty things on my papers, expect it back.
Why don't we start addressing the worthless friends that use up my niceness. I try to be sincere to everyone, but my gloves are off. I'm sure no one even cares enough to go dig them out of the trash. I waited for a fucking friend for hours just for him/her to say "I'm too tired," THEN go out later that night. Hey bud, btw you drove your roomates car that you HATE and were probably drunk, wouldn't she like to know. BUT, funny thing is, I don't even care enough about her to tell her. Another 'user upper.' Mommy and daddy spoiled her so rotten it emits from her bones in the form of underarmor, coach, and the attitude of 'I'm not even humble enough to admit that I've have put on a lot of college weight.' You both can go fuck yourselves. I'm done putting myself out there, and helping you with school work. Two studs can't even pass math 101 and chem 103.
I think it's my fault though, I surround myself with shitty ass people. I remember drug rehab from freshman year of high school. My counselor instructed me to draw out my 'quality world.' He said, fill it with people that CAN and WILL help you. I cannot belive how entirely right he was. I wish I would have sucked onto that phrase and never left that titty of truth. Can you help me? Will you help me? There's people that can but won't. Like a smart 'friend' that won't ever take time to sit down and explain something, a friend of potential. Or there's friends that can't even help you, or just don't even take the time to help you.
I'm trying to get this all out here so I don't feel impulsed to post some sappy status. I don't want to wear my emtions on my sleeve. That would be high school all over again. Someone greeted me today (after I greeted them OF COURSE) and said 'how are you?' This was uttered out of pure obligation, not one second of thought or heart was put into it. I reply GREAT. Fuck you, I save the truth for people that care. People that care, I could probably name on one hand. Mom, dad, nick, and daniel. Yup, I even have a spare finger and you all know which finger that is.
I have this STRONG feeling the wrong people will read this, and this could potentially start a lot of shit. You know what, fuck it. If you're reading this right now and are offended, get fucked. Sorry to mom or dad, my discretion to not use foul language went out the window, well I could say last night, but to be honest, a couple years back. BUT the strong notion for this to start shit went out the window when I realized those slime bags that it would offend, either (A) don't care enough about me to even dig into my shit or (B) stalk my stuff looking for this shit to hold against me, not to get to know me better, If that were the case, you would ask questions about me or use sentences that don't include "I, me, my, or mine" in them.
So, I guess overall I guess this is just me growing bitter and losing some of my discretion. Dad called it learning a life lesson, and I agree, but I see it more as growing an inch close to being that bitter old bird nobody goes and visits in the hospital when they're on their death bed. If that's the case, then tell me now so I can let my heart leather a little more.
